Watching over you (Tags: Takei, Ember?)

It sounded to Emberlynn as if the young guardsman before her wasn't necessarily looking for exciting.  Being personal guard to the Lord Holder might bring him some interesting situations, but she was guessing that more often than not, it would mean attending a social event and not being able to enjoy it.  Of course, that could be precisely what he wanted, but at the same time, she doubted he was considering that side of it.  

Serving as personal guard to the Lord Holder would mean job security, and stability.  Not that serving on the watch around the Hold wouldn't do the same, but the hours he'd be working would be more set, and he'd be less likely to be called out of bed at an odd hour to help hunt down missing goods stolen from the barracks.

Well, maybe.  He might still be enlisted to help with that.  And meet up with tavern wenches along the way...

The thought amused her, even as she considered that Bladen would probably appreciate the level of trust given to someone who stood as a personal guard.  Given what she knew of him, and the risk he appeared willing to take in his current situation…  That sort of trust and loyalty would probably be a big deal.

Beyond that, though, he'd probably want the stability to be able to provide for a wife and children.  Teaching would give him that as well.  Because it was pretty clear to her that Bladen was one of the nice young men all mothers wanted their daughters to marry.  He'd want to find a nice girl to match and settle down, not travel the world and see what there was to be seen.

"I'm sure your parents and siblings would be proud to see you in such a position," she told him, not completely sure if she was disappointed or not.  Not that she had a right to be.

"Indeed, knowing dragonriders would be helpful.  And though I've met several who've come through the Green in my time here, none of them have offered me a ride," she said with a shrug and a rueful smile.  It wasn't entirely true, of course-- most of them had at least jokingly offered to take her somewhere.  But she hadn't felt right taking them up on it-- she was Holdless, after all, and though she'd found a place here, it was entirely possible other places would be far less accepting of her status.  Plus, this way she could keep in touch with Kyo and everyone else that attempted to bring her news of her siblings.  If she moved on, without knowing where they were, it would be even harder to track them down.  Staying in one place might even give them the opportunity to travel this far and find her.

But she couldn't tell Bladen any of that.  So instead, she added, "Being able to come and go as one pleased would certainly be nice.  Though clearly it's not entirely easy, since you haven't seen your sister in a while.  Are dragonriders not given leave, as well?  Or is she still recovering from the accident?"  There could always be a reason the greenrider was unable to travel, herself, though he hadn't sounded as if there were when he spoke of her near-death experience.

"We'll see. Right now I think they are more proud of Lancelle. Dragonriding is an honorable profession." He was just glad S'dric, his cousin, was there to keep her from any real trouble. As for himself, he didn't think he would ever go to the Weyr except to visit family and mostly for Hatching celebrations and the like.

As she pointed out, not all riders were honorable. He doubted those riders had any interest in all in taking her to the weyr unless she was willing to give them something. If he were around to see that, he'd probably have to ask such men to leave. Ember didn't ask or want his protection but he would have a hard time not protecting her anyway. "I'm sure they found you beautiful and charming and wanted to take you away to the Weyr but they shouldn't just whisk away all the pretty young women on Pern. It wouldn't be fair."

He nodded, "True. She has had some setbacks which normal riders do not have. I wish I could say I was surprised that the Weyrwoman has kept her dragon grounded." He laughed, "Lance never was very good at following the rules of gender and hierarchy. No doubt she is learning the hard way at the Weyr. Once she is no longer in trouble I'm sure she'll visit the family but seeing as I'm here instead of there, who knows? She may already have visited our parents."

He realized, rather belatedly how very late it was becoming. They were well into the morning now. "I hope you don't find this too forward. I uhm, well I thought I'd not sound so completely silly but I find I'm rather at a loss. I've never done this before. Would you consider, uhm, I mean I understand if you don't want to, but I was hoping you might consider going courting or dating or whatever the equivalent of that is here with me."

He was pretty sure he had blown that completely. If she said yes, it wouldn't be because of his eloquence. Of course she barely knew him. And he had started this whole conversation off wrong. He was seriously going to beat himself up over this, especially if she said no. He almost wished he had not said anything. Take backs were allowed right? Now he was doing his best not to stare at her while she answered. Rather he looked to be having a conversation with the table.

"Perhaps she's had more trials and tribulations in her life to get through than you, but I'm sure they're no less proud of you," Ember reassured.  Being a guardsman was no less honorable.  "While she may protect people from dangers that fall from the sky, you help protect them from those that remain on the ground."

The barmaid had to laugh at his flattery.  "Indeed.  There wouldn't be any left for young guardsmen to flirt with, if that were the case, now would there?"  She couldn't resist teasing as she winked and lifted her mug to temporarily cover her smile.

Cocking her head to the side at Bladen's further description of his sister, Ember was intrigued that he'd bring gender up.  He did seem old-fashioned, but just what sort of rules for her gender could this Lance have a hard time following?  "Would your sister have preferred being a bronzerider, then, if she could be one?  Or even a blue- or brown rider?"  Perhaps she simply had a problem with authority, though, especially working under such other riders?  "I assume staying out of trouble when one has a dragon is probably a bit more difficult than without one."  A dragonrider would have two beings to worry about, not just one, after all.  "But surely she'd come here to visit you, as well, and not just the rest of your family?"  If they were that close, she couldn't imagine his sister wouldn't choose to come when she could.  Assuming she knew where he was, anyway.

Trying not to watch him too expectantly, Ember had the feeling his question was going to turn out to be exactly what it was as he continued to speak.  It wasn't the first time she'd been asked such a question, though it was probably the first time where it was truly sincere-- not fueled by alcohol or the fact that she'd just offered comfort in a time of great need.  Those were quite easy to turn down, though she found herself oddly not wanting to do so in Bladen's case.

It wouldn't be a good idea in the long run, despite how genuine he seemed.  She could potentially be found guilty of having aided a smuggler, if nothing else.  He'd certainly be blamed for being found in association with her if she agreed to his request.  Plus, as she'd been reminding herself already, she was Holdless, and not necessarily welcome in all social circles.  He'd be risking a lot for her, and she didn't want that for such a nice young man.

And there was also the idea that once she found true proof of where her siblings were, she'd leave Fort Sea Hold to find them.  She'd want to be free to go as soon as possible, so as not to lose their trail.  And if she was tied in any way to Bladen, she wouldn't be able to go without talking to him.  And if she let herself get attached, she'd be torn-- or ask him to come with her, and his dream was here at the Hold.  She couldn't ask him to leave it behind on a whim, if he even could, or would.

No, it was better she nip this in the bud, and let him down as gently as she could.

"I have to say… I'm extremely flattered, Bladen.  You've certainly caught me by surprise in asking."  She sat up straighter and kept her own gaze on his face, thinking it would be better for him to see how genuinely sorry she was that she couldn't take him up on his offer if he looked up.  And he deserved at least part of the truth, for being so honest with her.  "I… wish I could take you up on that.  But I'm afraid it wouldn't be fair to you if I did.  As you've said, I could still be found guilty of associating with a smuggler.  Your dream is to rise in the ranks of the Guard, and by associating with me, that could all be taken from you.  I couldn't do that to you, when you've got so much to lose."

When it came down to it, he had to look up as she responded. He wouldn't resist. Even when she was turning him down, her eyes were the most beautiful shade of blue. And while he could most certainly lose himself in them, he had made a point of listening to what she was saying.

In a way, he had known he was clinging to wishful thinking and hope when he waited for her answer. What had he been expecting? Bladen knew it would be unlikely for her to accept. He had really botched up the question to begin with and also, he was sure he had come across as too serious.

There were many reasons she could have turned him down and while her answer was honest, he got the feeling there was more to it. However, he was an honorable person. He would never make her feel bad for being honest and giving him an answer with any explanation was more than he could have expected.

He wanted to argue. He wanted to say it was a risk worth taking but it would do no good. She'd obviously made up her mind. So he nodded, "So you say." For now he would let it go but she had no idea what sort of person he truly was. If she thought he would give up on finding a way for them to be together, she was would be sorely mistaken.

"Well before I make this any more awkward, I should go." He said, forcing a smile. "Thank you for your honesty, Emberlynn." Standing up, he took a moment to think before he would walk out. Maybe she didn't feel what he was feeling but that didn't invalidate his feelings. Bladen had the strangest feeling ever since he met her that he would never feel the same way about anyone else. It was a strange thing really. Who really  believed in falling in love with someone at first glance. Certainly he never had and here he was.

So she said?  Did he not believe her?  Ember found it a rather odd response, especially given how he'd earlier told her how much a risk he was taking just in warning her.  But he said nothing else to elaborate, even though she got the feeling he wanted to say more.

Standing as he did, the young barmaid gave a slightly sympathetic smile in response and inclined her head.  "And I thank you for yours, Bladen."  It had been his idea to have their little chat in the first place, after all.  "I truly appreciate what you came here to tell me and I will heed the warning."  After a short pause, she added, "And I do hope you'll still come to visit the Wild Green as time allows."  Despite having refused him, she'd still like the chance to talk to him.  If for nothing else other than his own good, and the need to relax every once in a while.

At least now she was admitting she could need his warning. Women were stubborn. "Please do." Bladen turned to her for a moment and resisted the urge to take her hand. "I will. To visit you."

He was not going to say more than that. He had said what he needed to. Now he had better go. Maybe she would have time to think about things. Maybe in time he might stand a chance. He needed to take his mind off of her for a little while. It might be a good time to practice.

Bladen made his way to the Barracks, lost in thought so he didn't have any reason to take notice of any abnormalities on the way.

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