Tangled Mass of Knots (tags; Q'rijn)

The thing about T'veli was that he had a hard time staying focused. And most of the time, even when he got distracted, he could figure out what had happened when he zoned out- conversations followed patterns, Velikath would figure out what part of the lesson he'd missed, so it hadn't been that big of a problem during Weyrlinghood.

Until it came time for the Weyrlings to learn how to make their own harnesses.

And then the practice material snarled, and twisted, and the ties he put in where in the wrong place, and by the end of the first lesson, Tiv had nothing close to a harness.

To be fair, many of the other Weyrlings also had terrible first harnesses, but no one came close to having one as terrible as Tiv. And as the class cleaned up, and went to shuffle off to their other tasks and lessons, Tiv tried to keep his composure, even looking at the absolute mess in front of him.

Which was when Q'rijn approached and offered to help Tiv in their free time. Honestly, that was a little strange. Like, Tiv considered Q'rijn a friend, but Q'rijn didn't really speak to people, or offer to hang out with them.

Which probably meant that Tiv's attempt at a harness was so awful that it offended Q'rijn's smith crafting roots.

However, Velikath had told Tiv that she thought taking Q'rijn up on the offer was a good idea, and it did mean that Tiv didn't have to ask the Weyrling Master for a tutor, and Q'rijn's practice harness had looked really nice.

Fingers twisting the practice material nervously, Tiv waited for Q'rijn to arrive at one of the classrooms off the Weyrbowl, trying to remind himself that there was nothing to be worried about. Q'rijn wasn't going to yell if Tiv had a hard time focusing, and this was probably the best solution Tiv could have hoped for. The Weyrling Master could be very cross when Weyrlings took too long learning their lessons.

When the lesson had finished, Q'rijn had noticed one person in particular who should have asked for help and didn't. It was typical of the greenrider not to ask for help when needed. He was trying to avoid embarrassment which to Q'rijn was silly to worry about. The only thing he should be concerned with was getting his harness made correctly. So in a flash of complete idiocy, he offered to show T'veli how to make a harness. Easier said than done, of course.

Just be yourself.
Right, right. He agreed, feeling himself losing conviction as he said it.
You said you would help. You cannot back out now, even if you want to. Besides, emotion has nothing to do with this. All you are doing is helping your clutchmate. Its nothing to be nervous about.
I'm not nervous. I've never taught anyone before. Should be interesting. I suppose if I continued my education and became a full smith, I would one day have become a Master, at which point I would have to teach.
I was referring to your infatuation.
Well so long as he doesn't know, it can't hurt anyone.

The dragon knew better than to respond to that. They could both be overly logical and critical. Being in a relationship with others became emotional and chaotic. Neither of them was prepared for either of those things. For now, Q'rijn was content just to help the other Weyrling and hope he understood, he was trying to be nice.

Knocking on the door before he walked through the doorway, he peered around the door to see T'veli there. He didn't smile, but then Q'rijn almost never did. "You ready to start?" He asked then walked over to the table where he set down more material.

"Now I know the Weyrling Master taught everyone how to do this the same way but I didn't follow his instructions. I made the harness in a way that was easier for me. Which is why I make a good enough smith. I know how to take something complex and simplify it. So as long as you don't have any objections I would like to teach you the easier version. It will still require some time, focus and patience on your part, T'veli." He said, as he was just as critical of his friends as he was of himself and even his enemies when he had them. He meant he knew how T'veli could be. He was very distractable and impatient.

A stray thought wandered in during his criticism of the greenrider, and beautiful. Careful there. He warned himself. He too needed to focus.

T'veli probably would have started talking the second that Q'rijn walked in, but the Brownrider started talking from almost the second that Q'rijn entered the room.

And well, Q'rijn talking that much was kind of surprising, so Tiv kept himself quiet, and actually took a few seconds before replying to Q'rijn's question.

"I, uh, yeah. I think I have the focus for that. Uhm. Thank you for helping me." Tiv bit his lip to stop himself from talking, and shoved the mass of practice material over to Q'rijn.

"I think it might be easier if you show me?" Tiv commended, not making eye contact with Q'rijn. He could feel Velikath's sudden interest in his lesson in the back of his mind, but T'veli resolutely attempted to keep all of his attention focused on Q'rijn's hands.

Which were really quite nice- all muscular and clever and- Tiv frowned. Was his concentration really that bad that he was getting distracted by Q'rijn's hands? No wonder people thought he was hopeless. He was!

Tiv blushed a little bit, and forced himself to really focus on what Q'rijn was saying and doing, and to not pay attention to the fact that Q'rijn's voice was really nice, and that the Brownrider ought to use it more, nor to the fact that he was being so nice taking his time to show Tiv what to do, even though Q'rijn knew that Tiv had a hard time focusing and it was probably Tiv's fault in the first place that he hadn't been able to follow along with the Weyrling Master.

He was not used to thank you's or any appreciation from anyone. Q'rijn then responded the only way he could think how. "It's no problem. Really."Clearing his throat a little, "Okay. I'll do one step, then you mimic it with your own material."

Q'rijn explained in a much simpler way what to do first. The first part should be taking the pieces you need to make the harness and putting them in place so that one always knows what piece to use next. "All of your materials should be laid in front of you like mine. Once they are, we can take the starting piece. Which is the one all the way to the left. Lay it down in front of you, flat."

As he spoke he thought perhaps T'veli was staring a little too intently at his hands. Was it his scars? Well a Smith couldn't help but have rough scarred hands from all the work with hot objects. Maybe he found them unsightly? He hoped not! He noticed everything T'veli did. The biting of his lip and the staring and the slight flush in his cheeks.

All he could do was wonder at what the handsome greenrider was thinking. His face was always so expressive. Maybe it should be more obvious what the other man was thinking but maybe even being an expressive type of person, T'veli had his own secrets. Q'rijn couldn't fault him for that. He was a secretive sort himself.

Tiv straightened all of his materials out, and copied Q'rijn's pattern exactly- at least Tiv thought it was exactly. It looked the same, but maybe he'd transposed two, but it didn't look like it.

No, Tiv felt sure that he'd put everything together properly.

"This is the one I start with?" He questioned, selecting the rope that was all the way to the left, trying not to pay too much attention to Q'rijn's hands.

He was going to have to keep his thoughts to himself. Q'rijn was a Brownrider, and he wasn't Weyrborn, he hadn't shown any interest in men, and Tiv knew first hand how some of the Holdborn responded when men tried to flirt with them.

It was not conducive to friendships, and T'veli really did like Q'rijn. So, he kept his eyes from lingering on Q'rijn's body, which was hard. Look at the way Q'rijn was dressed!

To be fair, T'veli was probably wearing something similar- dark, serviceable clothing that were a lot tighter than they'd been at the start of training- being a Weyrling had packed on a fair amount of muscle, with his sleeves rolled up past his elbows,

But T'veli didn't have distracting scars, or- well, any of the other distracting items of Q'rijn that he was ignoring because he was focusing on the lesson at hand.

He was, serious.

"Yes, that is the Fore Strap. It will go on the neck, just behind the neckridge and in front of where you'll sit. Generally its fairly thick and padded. The second strap is the Aft Strap." He said, picking up the next strap. Obviously these were smaller than what they would actually be working with but the principle was the same.

"This one is larger and it is going to be around the neck, behind where you'll sit, just before Velikath's chest and shoulders." He was still holding the larger of the two straps mentioned so far when he asked T'veli.

"Now tell me, what is the first strap and where does it go? Then tell me what the second one is and where it goes. I try to imagine myself on the dragon, as that helps me remember how it should look but if its easier to think of it off the dragon or when you aren't on the dragon that is fine. However you'll remember it."

Maybe he was taking his time because T'veli needed it. Or maybe he was taking his time because it meant more time with T'veli. Still he didn't suppose it mattered. Being thorough was a good idea. While T'veli's staring didn't bother him really. If someone was going to stare at him, let it be someone who he could stare at in return and find some pleasure in what he was seeing.

Tiv cleared his throat.

"This is the Fore Strap, and it will rest in front of where I'll sit. And that is the Aft Strap, and it'll go behind where I'll sit." T'veli recited dutifully.

"Do you think next time we could practice on Velikath?" He asked, seriously. "I think I'll remember better if I've put them there before. And then Velikath could help me remember what goes where. She does that a lot. She's very helpful."

Tiv feels his eyes go a little starry, but he can't help the way he feels about his Green, nor does he want too. She's just the best Dragon a rider could hope for, and she's very helpful about patching up his weak spots.

Tiv shot Q'rijn a grin, emboldened by how calm Q'rijn had been so far.

"Good." He nodded, that was close enough in his mind. As long as T'veli would be able to tell what straps went where that would be half the battle. "Of course, we just need to wait for the actual straps. These are too small, even for a smaller dragon, like Velikath." He wouldn't mind at all but he didn't want to sound excited about spending more one on one time with T'veli.

"I'm sure we'll have time to do that after class the day we get the actual straps." He was also sure the green would have plenty to say. Tiv had to talk to his dragon more than he spoke with the rest of them but knowing how talkative he could be, Q'rijn guessed that Velikath might be the same.

"Okay now both of those straps criss cross on the dragons chest, where you'll find the Neck Plate." He held up the piece that looked like a large padded shield. "We can make yours a special design for Velikath if you want since its the most decorative piece. Anyway, for now, this Neck Plate is going to hold both the Aft Strap and the Fore Strap in place." He put the neck and aft straps, criss-crossed through the Neck Plate.

"Feel like you got it so far?" Q'rijn asked as calmly as before. He had infinite patience when it came to certain things. Teaching T'veli was apparently one of those things. "Now we're going to move away from the neck area."

The next strap wasn't really part of regular strapping for dragon flight but he wanted to give T'veli all the information. "This strap is the Chest Strap and is only used when there is extra cargo ro passengers or the weather is very gusty.The Chest Strap is large and belt like, going around the dragon’s torso, just behind the wings and forelegs. The fore and aft straps can be connected to this for added stability."

Q'rijn didn't smile much but he did appreciate T'veli's smile. He was so emotive and animated in his face. He probably had a hard time playing dragon poker because of that, he guessed. Not that he assumed the other young man played any such games. He didn't know what to do around Tiv at this point so acting a teacher seemed rather safe unfortunately, he was rather task driven while Tiv was driven more by what he felt in the moment and was accordingly distracted.

T'veli nodded along to Q'rijn's explanation, shooting the other rider an odd glance when Q'rijn mentioned them making a personalized chest plate for Velikath.

I want one.

Yes, I know you do. But usually Riders go to a Crafthall to get personalized chest plates. I remember I'quare and R'eriol talking about it.

Then go to a crafthall. I want one.

And I'll get you one! But don't you think it's weird?

Velikath's lack of response spoke volumes. He was probably just over thinking things again, and really, Tiv ought to know better by now.  Tiv winced when he realized that he had not been paying attention to Q'rijn for however long his and Velikath's conversation had lasted. It hadn't been more than a minute (Tiv hoped), but still.

"Yes, I think I'm following you. I think I was using the Fore Strap as the Chest Strap before, which doesn't even make any sense, but they're all the same color, and sometimes it's hard to see what exactly is happening, you know?" Tiv took a deep breath, remembering that he did have to breath when talking.

"Is the Chest Strap also something we'd use while Threadfighting?" Tiv was a child of the Weyr, and had grown up with the idea of Thread as something that could happen any day, which is why a Watch Dragon had to be constantly vigilant (He'd also learned about the ideas of intervals, passes, and how those were timed, but Tiv assumed if there could be long intervals, then there could be rogue Thread as well).

"I've never understood how you kept the Firestone bags from falling off. But even having Dragonriders in the family, I never got a huge amount of time around Dragons until I Impressed."

"I think if you practice a few times with Velikath, it will seem much easier." Besides, Q'rijn thought the Weyrling Master had breezed over the topic like everyone understood the harness easily. Some people didn't really do well with that sort of overview and needed to know what was used for what and why.

"Not necessarily. If the weather was extreme or you felt you needed the added support." He didn't think that anyone would truly need it unless the winds were severe or they were really loaded down with cargo. Firestone was another matter entirely.

He shrugged, "I'm sure you know more about dragons than I do. My father is a Minor Holder in Southern Boll." He didn't feel the need to claim kinship to the Weyrwoman. His father was cousin of the Lord of Southern Boll, which meant he was a cousin once removed or something like that. His parents would claim such an alliance as soon as possible in a conversation.

"I have three older brothers and three older sisters and the one younger sister, so the Holding would never have fallen to me. Being a younger son my parents found me a place in a Crafthall. I would have made a very good Smith, maybe even a master but I was Searched. And now I'm a dragonrider."

He was talking more than he ever spoke to anyone. Maybe Tiv's talkativeness was rubbing off on him. "Anyway I'm inclined to agree with you. Thread will be back. That is why Weyrwoman Karene is trying to get Igen operational. We'll need every Weyr working at its full capacity to succeed in fighting Thread with minimal loss of life." That was something Q'rijn also knew would happen. There would be losses.

"Firestone bags have their own strap which we're almost at. We've got one more before we touch on that."

"You're Holdbred? I thought you were from a crafting family." T'veli sputtered, surprised.

"You look like you must be the son of a Smith. And you have a lot of siblings. Is that normal? Are they all full siblings?" Tiv really didn't know much about the world outside of the Weyr. His mother was Holdbred but she was a dragonrider, and wasn't that involved in his upbringing, and his father's family had been Weyrbred for generations.

His own family was a little unusual, with all of his siblings being full siblings. Tiv assumed that had to do with his mother's upbringing, but he didn't know.

"I'm the youngest- two brothers and a sister. My sister isn't a rider, but my mom and brother's are. My father isn't either. A rider that is. Do you have any nieces or nephews? Or children, I suppose." Tiv liked children, and hoped to have some of his own some day. He tended to prefer men, but anything could happen.

"I think one of my brother is going to transfer to Igen." Tiv confided. "Our mother is really against it, but he's put his name out there and everything." Tiv frowned, and then go back on track.

"Okay, so what's the next strap?"

"Yeah, I think a lot of people assume that." Probably because he didn't flaunt his heritage around like other people did around here. He honestly didn't see how it mattered who his parents were. What mattered was what he was and how he lived his own life. Still history did help one move forward.

"Well some Holding families are very large. Some are not. I think it depends on who you talk to. I think Holders are no different from weyrfolk in their desire to see their lineage go on and to procreate enough so that when Thread comes or if there is a disaster of another kind, they still have heirs." He shrugged.

"My mother was fertile. Not all women are."

Honestly, there wasn't much more to say on the matter. "Nieces and nephews but I've never met them. I have no children." He wasn't sure if he ever would in all honesty. He had no desire to bed a woman. Maybe if he settled with someone who wanted children he could foster. He wasn't sure about that yet though. It seemed like a selfish thing for someone in his position to do. If he fostered children and then was killed in Threadfall... well he couldn't see himself being selfish enough to leave children behind like that.

"Why doesn't she want him to go? Isn't there a lot of opportunity for new riders there?"

He left the topic there as he reached for the next strap. This talking was kind of nice. He hadn't really opened up to anyone at the Weyr yet. Q'rijn thought it would be more difficult and maybe it would have been if T'veli were someone else.

"These are called bridge straps and they connect or bridge, the neck straps and the chest strap. Sometimes only the two neck straps. These are more thin, but no less sturdy."

Tiv didn't really see anything wrong with Q'rijn having never met his nieces and nephews (after all, some of the children in the Weyr would have a hard time picking their parents out in the Dining Caverns), but it did make Tiv wonder if Q'rijn didn't like children.

After all, it did seem sometimes like Q'rijn didn't like anyone. And even Tiv could get overwhelmed by kids.

"I'qure doesn't want to go to Igen for the opportunity." Tiv confided seriously, as though gossip wasn't something he greatly enjoyed.

"He's just flighty- you'd almost expect him to be a Greenrider. I mean, he's not. He's a Bluerider, but he's always breaking his Weyrmate's hearts, and his Wingleader called him out, and asked him to stop seducing his Wingmates, and I'qure didn't take that very well. You know how it is." Tiv shrugged a little.

"Our mother just thinks he's leaving for the wrong reasons, and keeps making these like, pretend wise statements. Like the things you'd expect to hear at the end of one of those stupid tales Harpers tell the toddlers. Like, 'no matter where you go, you'll always bring yourself' or 'order your mind, and your life will follow'."

Tiv's mother was heavily involved with her family for a Rider, and all of her children had mostly maintained the closeness once they'd grown up. Tiv had a feeling she didn't like I'qure threatening to leave because she didn't want the rest of them getting any ideas. Velikath could take lessons from his mother on possessiveness.

"So, are these straps more likely to fray that the thicker ones?"

Actually Q'rijn didn't know how it was. He wasn't really used to the openness of relations a the weyr. He wasn't used to it being okay for men to be attracted to men. He was afraid even to admit it to himself most of the time that he was in fact attracted to men. Keadilanth had been completely understanding of his preference and didn't seem at all bothered by it. The dragon had always known so it never surprised him.

Q'rijn had yet to be in any relationship but he got the feeling he was the type to be in one serious relationship and not be as Tiv put it, flighty. He also hoped all greenriders were not flighty. The most attractive men at the weyr were greenies!

"Maybe he will be changed by the experience of moving to a weyr without family to support him. He might learn the value of caring about his wingmate's emotions and be less self pleasing. Besides, I'm sure if things do not go well at Igen he will have the opportunity to come back to Fort. "

One never knew though. Family was a strange beast, his own included. He had a sister that would never speak to him again and a long list of people who thought him too quiet to be paid attention to. He didn't mind though, he wasn't around his family much, if at all, so he didn't really have to get too concerned over them. No emotional attachment was expected.

"Not more likely to fray but when they do fray there is less material so you'll need to replace them more quickly if they do fray. It should still take a long time for that to happen if you care for your straps well."


He toook the next straps in his hands and showed them to T'veli, "These are tethering or tether straps. They are smaller straps that holds objects like firestone sacks, baskets, carrysacks, etc. They attach either to the neck strap or chest strap."

Tiv waved his hand dismissively.

"It's not a big deal, me and I'qure aren't that close. It's just that Khala- she's Khila- my niece's mother- supervised me at the creche, and she was telling me about it at dinner a couple of days ago. That he'd actually signed up- my mother doesn't know that yet. I think I'll duck out of our next family gather."

If R'eriol had been threatening to leave T'veli might have been more upset. He'd always been closer to the Brownrider, and Tiv had often considered trying to get into R'eriol's wing. And the idea of leaving the comforts of Fort weren't very attractive either. It had been hundreds of Turns since Igen had been abandoned, and it was probably chock full of tunnelsnakes and bandits and hard packed dirt.

"But you might be right about, you know, getting promoted and stuff. Are you going to head to Igen and become a Wingleader?"

Tiv was joking, thought it wasn't unheard of for a Brownrider to be a Wingleader. Mostly it was a temporary thing- they were the senior Wingsecond and the Wingleader was wounded, or something. Tiv had taught a lesson in the creche about a couple of them- in fact, he vaguely remembers that there had been a ballad associated with one of them.

"Oh, well that makes sense. Thank you. I would have never figured out these straps by myself."

"Family gatherings sound stressful..." He said as he remembered to put that tidbit of information in the back of his mind. If Tiv ever invited him to a family gathering, he should find a way to bow out gracefully. That is if T'veli ever accepted him as a potential mate. He was getting ahead of himself. He knew it was a long shot. A man could dream though.

He shrugged, "We're still young for that kind of promotion. Focusing on graduating and maybe making some friends." Sure he could ask if Tiv was going and say he would go if T'veli was but he knew that would sound completely crazy right now. "Anyway, I like Fort Weyr. The Weyrwoman for one, is amazing and I would like to continue working in the smithy. She said she would like to heard about some of my alterations to flamethrowers. She'd be interested in using them for the Queen's Wing. At least I'm hoping she was serious."

He thought perhaps that was a bit too much information. Q'rijn was not one to brag but there could be no doubt he was rather proud of his flamethrower work. "What about you? Not going to trade in Fort for the warm Igen heat are you?"

Q'rijn never really smiled, he almost did though, just then. He could feel his facial muscles change. Weird. Well he would say it was the effect being around T'veli had on him. "Anytime. Really. It's nice, you know, talking. I think we should do this more."

"I don't know very much about Flamethrowers." Tiv admitted cheerfully. "I wasn't old enough for ground-crew training before I Impressed. But I think if you explain the chances the same way you explained how the harness works, I could probably understand."

Tiv's eyes crinkled, and he stood and stretched, having a feeling that harness training was over for the day.

"And I don't think I'd want to head over to Igen. Why take the risk on a new place when you're happy where you are? Besides, I'm a Greenrider- the kinds of promotions I can get are like, Searchrider, and it's not like I'd have to switch Weyrs to secure that kind of promotion! I could test my aptitude for that as soon as I graduate. Sweeprider is the same deal. Besides, I know all the best Wingleaders, and how to get a better Weyr. Igen probably won't even have running water."

Tiv moved to the other side of the table so he could shove Q'rijn lightly. "And if you're looking for friends, you've made an excellent choice with me. And we should go hunt up some dinner and talk more about your adventures with the Fort Weyrwoman. I have to hear all about this."

"Once the improvements are finalized and approved by Weyrwoman Karene I'll show it to you." He promised and then started to clean up the fake straps, putting them in one of the leather bags in the room. He could almost breathe in a deep breath knowing that Tiv had no plans to leave. He wanted to be in the same place as the effervescent greenrider.

He did not comment that T'veli might have more opportunities if he wanted them. People could often break barriers when they truly wanted to but he got the feeling, Tiv wanted to be a wingrider. He didn't care much about his rank, at least not at the moment.

The unexpected shove, although it caught him off guard, it did not hurt but actually it made him almost tremble as he tried to conceal his feelings. Just pretend it was someone you don't like, who touched you.

"Okay. I'll follow your lead."